Remember that time I got engaged? Yeah, I forget about it a lot too, actually. That's probably why you've never heard the story. It was summer when we met. Specifically, it was July 5th. I was at a barbecue in LA when this handsome guy sat down next to me and started chatting me up. There was something about the way he moved his mouth that makes me have no idea what on Earth he actually said to me. I do remember that I was eating a hot dog, and was very self conscious about it. I remember that he was very focused on talking with me. I remember that he asked me for my number. I told him I lived in Arizona, and he said that was just fine... so I gave him my number. I was pretty sure I was never going to hear from him when I went home the next morning. July 9th was one of my bestie's birthday, and she was having a party at this fancy shmancy house nearby. There was a tube slide from the roof into the pool, and the long pool ended in a white sand beach. The staircase inside was straight out of a movie. The garage had twenty amazing cars, stacked one on top of the other, and the guys and I had a blast ogling those and the motorcycles for a while. My dad is a car guy, and I am his daughter. Right about the time I was drooling over Eleanor, my phone rang. It was Matthew Fox. I was surprised, to say the least! We chatted awhile, and in the course of it, I told him of my surroundings. He said, "I wish I was there." I said, "Well then... come over!" He obviously wasn't expecting to hear that, and said, "But I live in LA". My reply was a test, of sorts. I said, "Come onnnnn.... Be Spontaneous!" He paused for just a moment, and said he'd drive out in about an hour. I smiled. Handsome, and does what I want, just for asking." This was going to be a good thing. Hours later he showed up on my doorstep with a friend of his that I'd actually met previously. We spent the next day together and they drove out in less than 24 hours. July 13th, three days later, he and I had spoken a few more times, and he said he wanted to talk to me about something. Sure. He said he felt like it would be a good idea if we got married! I thought he must be joking! Of course he was joking, right? No. He was very serious. He asked when I would want to get married and I said I'd like to get married in June... because of 7 Brides for 7 Brothers. In that movie it's said that if you marry in June you'll be a bride all your life. I said that and he reiterated that he was serious. I said I was too, and then he reasoned that it was a good idea, we'd know each other 11 months before getting married! Well. Uhhhh. Ok...... He asked what kind of ring I'd like. I said 3 carats. He said ok. Huh. Ummmm. Ok...... He said some more things and asked a few more questions and all the while I was thinking, "What on Earth am I doing?!? I can't Marry him! I don't even Know him!!!" I'd already refused two proposals from men I'd known Quite longer! This is Crazy!!! How would that even work?" Well, next thing I knew, I'd agreed to marry a handsome stranger. Sounds like a Disney movie? Yeah, I'm sure that was in there somewhere too. Over the next 6 months we spoke almost constantly. We made wedding plans, I adored my sparkly rock. He called me every morning with a sweet, "Good morning Beautiful!" and we talked until I had to get going. He called every day when I got off work. My friends soon got tired of me talking to them and him on, the phone, at the same time. My phone bill skyrocketed to over $400 that first month. He made trips out to Arizona, I made trips out to Santa Clarita. It was perfect. Wait... no it wasn't. Over the phone it was. I answered everything right for him, and he answered everything right for me. There was absolute open, honest communication. We learned everything about each other, and there were no red flags, no deal breakers. We worked together to strengthen our relationship. Oh, funny thing, his last name... Fox. So, I asked him if he was related to a prominent person in our religion with that last name. He said that no, that was a different family... but he was related to the governor of a state. Oh. How boring. Fast forward a few years until that governor ran for President of the United States. It was weird watching him on tv. They are obviously related. Anyway, so it was perfect... but not. I started to discover that he really annoyed me in person. He couldn't take a joke, he couldn't dance. He didn't mesh seamlessly with my friends, and kind of hung back in social situations. He moved like he was insecure or nervous all the time, and though he was definitely one of the most handsome men I've dated, he never got past the awkwardness in person. Oh, and he threw a tantrum... that's attractive in a grown man. Not. Anyway, he also had this thing where he was strangely aware of designer jeans. He always said I needed to get some and that 7 For All Mankind (7's) were the best. Later that became a red flag when others would speak highly of their Diesels. Hahaha. Come on guys, I wanna be the girl in the relationship!! The breaking point came just after Thanksgiving. There was a party at a ranch one night. There is a big, open area outside that was being used as the dance floor, and if you wandered out and about, you might find your shoe in some sort of horse or cow... um, excrement. Well, that's what happened to Matthew. He stepped in something, complained to me profusely, and apparently I didn't give the response he expected. Now, at the time, I was the most shallow and girly I've ever been in my life. I cared about sparkly things, and matching my shoes to my belt to my purse. That sort of girl. Even so, at the time, I would have hollered about it to anyone who was within earshot, got a few laughs, kicked it off my shoe, and continued with my night. I figured Matthew was doing that. Some time later, I realized he had been gone a while and after much searching, I found him in the car, with his arms folded across the steering wheel, and his forehead on his arms. I have nothing but disdain for that level of sissy (in the nicest way possible). I told him to come out, that he was making a bad impression, and he half cried that his shoes were in the Trunk!! Hahaha. Ok, let me get them for you. They Stink!! Ok... then stay here. I'll be back in twenty when I'm ready to go. It happened that he was driving out early the next day, and honestly, I was so ready for him to go. After he'd gone, one of my best guy friends came over. We had dated a while earlier, but he had something going on that really scared me when it came to the thought of 'our' future. We were absolutely wonderful friends though. He was a particularly manly man. He was big and strong, worked with his hands, had the kind of fun that made him go mostly blind in one eye, and was working the MMA circuit. I told him about what had happened and he said fifteen words that will forever be etched in my mind. I can hear them as I type them, "You don't want your daughters to learn to be prissy from their father, do you?" I laughed, he laughed, and the light bulb shone brightly. Of Course Not!!! In that instant, all the handsome, smart, rich, connected... everything, melted away and I was Absolutely Done with him. I went out with someone else that night. Someone else that also has a rather funny story here as well :)
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